While the online discourse of “Who is the REAL Agent Argylle” was fun, the film does not deliver when it comes to its story, pacing or effects.

When the first trailer dropped for Argylle, I was immediately hooked.  Not because it looked particularly high-brow or a future indie darling, but because it looked so ridiculous that it was perfectly tailored to me.  Goofy entertaining spy thrillers are a genre of film that has seemed to fade since the 2000s/2010s, so I was excited to see if it would be revitalized thanks to Matthew Vaugh’s newest project.  Unfortunately, the result did not live up to expectations.

Somewhat based on the novel of the same name, Argyllefollows author Elly Conway (whose real-life persona is a mystery all on its own) is thrown into the life of a spy when Aiden saves her from near death after the Division attacks her.  Why has this crime organization targeted this random author?  Because her novels have predicted actual events that have taken place and her newest book might be the key to the future.

Even with a stacked cast, their goofy and over-the-top performances cannot save the story trying to be told.  Bryce Dallas Howard stars as Elly Conway, the timid famous author of the Argylle series that seems to be more important than she thinks.  Howard was perfectly cast as this character as she is able to bring the charm and acts as the audience insert for what is happening.  We learn everything alongside her, making you someone you want to root for as her world changes in an instant.  The rest of the supporting cast – including the likes of Bryan Cranston, Catherine O’Hara, and Samuel L Jackson – know exactly what type of movie they are in, and their performances show it.  They all play one-dimensional caricatures of stereotypical spy characters that add nothing interesting to the genre.  Henry Cavill, John Cena, Ariana DeBose and Dua Lipa are also off to the side as they play the characters from Conway’s novels, but they are not in the film enough to make it worth seeing the film just for them.  The best performance by far is Sam Rockwell as Aiden, the spy who helps Conway keep away from the Division.  He not only brings the silly energy the film seemed to portray but was also vulnerable in the more impactful scenes.  With a better story, he could have been a complete star.

The biggest issue is the story.  A film relies so much on the story that when that aspect falls flat, you can easily feel it.  It seemed as though the filmmakers wanted to include as many twists as possible in the 2 hour and 19-minute runtime.  It is fun to keep the audience on their toes to help keep them engaged with the film, but with every twist there seemed to be another 20 minutes added on to the runtime.  While twists can be fun and beneficial to what is being told, too many can bring the viewer out of the experience.  It threw off the pacing of the film and at many moments when you thought the film was going to end and then it just kept going.  Nothing ruins a movie experience more than hoping it will finally end.

The special effects did not help with the storytelling either.  In a spy thriller, there is an expected suspension of disbelief that goes into creating the world we as the audience are about to enter.  But when you can easily tell that the effects are so fake, it makes it near impossible to even attempt to see how this could potentially realistically happen.  Some of the sets, particularly the one in France, looked gorgeous and more practical effects would have been one way to keep your audience’s attention.  The amount of special effects that was relied upon to relay this story only brought it down.

There was so much that could have made this film an enjoyable time that could have easily become a crowd pleaser.  But with average performances and a story that attempts to keep you on your toes, Argylle falls short of a good time.  

Grade: C+

Oscar Prospects:
Likely: None
Should be Considered: None

Where to Watch: In Theaters